Not Yet
The past week has been much busier than usual.
As most of y’all know, since moving to Virginia, my husband and I made the decision that it makes more sense for me to just stay home with our son Walter instead of getting another full-time job like I had in Georgia.
Babysitters for full-time work schedules can become very expensive and hard to coordinate, and even harder when the child has any sort of special circumstance.
I’ve greatly enjoyed being able to spend all of this quality time with my son over the past year, and it’s been such a blessing that we had the opportunity to make this choice in the first place.
But here recently, I’ve been feeling the call to take on a bit more.
I think that both Walter and I have been starting to feel really stagnant in the new rhythm we’ve fallen into. He’s at the age where he gets bored easily and lashes out– desperately needing someone who can truly keep up with him. More than anything, he needs a friend.
He gets so happy on Sundays when he gets to play with other littles in Sunday school. Which consequently makes my heart very happy.
It helped me realize that I think that he wants, and needs, some friends. As a parent, I also know that the more socialized he can be at this age, the better.
In turn, I realized that I need a little more socialization, too. Maybe even more than that, I need somewhere to put some of the energy and creativity I've been carrying around lately.
Obviously, my greatest purpose in life is to serve God, and to also joyfully serve my family and those I love. I truly wouldn’t trade it for the world.
But I feel so conditioned to be busy all the time; my mind wanders into far off places that I don’t enjoy visiting when I’m not. This is something I’ve been working on for years, and it surely has improved, but lately I’ve really been feeling it.
In an effort to help us both out, I’ve started doing a bit of babysitting here and there. He gets to make some friends and get some quality playtime, and I get to help out other families and also help support ours a bit while finding a bit of extra purpose along the way.
I remember how much we used to struggle trying to find an affordable babysitter for our situation back in Georgia; it was virtually impossible to find a good fit that didn’t charge more than I made an hour.
So with my work now, I’ve sought to be a solid, safe, affordable option for other military families in the area. So far, it has been so wonderful.
It also allows me to pause and reflect on the beautiful memories and times I had when I used to work as a nanny– it was the job that brought me down to Jacksonville, FL in the first place. When they needed fewer hours due to work schedule changes, I took the job at the barn on the side. It was such a busy season of my life, but I enjoyed every second of it.
On top of all of this, I have felt inspired to pick up my camera again for the first time in a few years.
FUN FACT: A few years ago, I started a photography “business” where I was taking clients to do small portrait and family sessions for a while while I was working at the barn in Jacksonville.
Also, here’s the link to my new website for anyone interested, or anyone who just wants to support this new endeavor! I appreciate you all! <3
https://thegoldenlaine.mypixieset.com/
@thegoldenlaine on Instagram
I used to enjoy it so much, but as I took on more responsibility at the barn, I had less time for photography. But now, my schedule leaves time for almost everything, so I realized the opportunity to step back into a hobby I used to adore so greatly.
Within the first week, I’ve already managed to secure a few bookings, and I’m ecstatic to help these families capture these sweet seasons of life.
All of this is pretty much just to say that, you never know what each season of your life holds.
For me, it has been so all over the place that sometimes I even find it difficult to recall; especially with the way that God will call me away from certain things, just to bring them back when the time is right later on.
I remember how frustrated I used to get–
When my work life was struggling because I couldn’t find a babysitter,
When I stopped nannying full-time because I felt called to take the full-time position at the barn I was working at on the weekends,
When I put down the camera to pursue my career as a horsewoman,
Or even when I stopped working because it was clear that I was needed most at home for the time being.
God has a funny way of bringing things back around if it's what’s good for you, in a way that only He can truly understand.
Looking back, I don't think any of those seasons were wasted. At the time, some of them felt like doors closing. Now, I can see that some were simply doors I wasn't meant to walk through again– not yet.
“He has made everything beautiful in its time. Also, He has put eternity into man’s heart, yet so that he cannot find out what God has done from the beginning to the end.”
Ecclesiastes 3:11 (ESV)
So for what it’s worth, I just want to encourage you if you’re in a busy transitional season like this, or even if you’re moving out of your busy season into a slower one that you’re not exactly ecstatic about:
Just lean on Him through it all. We may not know His plan, but we do know that He doesn't break His promises. Take comfort in knowing that He goes before you, even when you can't see where He's taking you. What feels like an ending may simply be a season you're not meant to understand yet.
“Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for He who promised is faithful.”
Hebrews 10:23 (ESV)
Until next week,
— E. Byers, author of The Grassy Laine
